Follow Me Down
by Eternally Ebony
Summary: Based off of Alice in Wonderland. Zim follows the White Rabbit into Wonderland, and becomes a prisoner of the Red Queen! Now, it's up to Dib to save both him and Wonderland... intended ZADF
1. Down the Rabbit Hole

**Disclaimer: IZ and Alice in Wonderland does not belong to me.**

It was just another normal day. Well, as normal as it could get for a paranormal investigator protecting his home planet from an evil alien invader. Skool had just ended, and Zim was going on and on about the superiority of the Irken race... whatever. It was really getting old, and Dib had to get home. He had half a mind to leave when Zim said something that started an irreversible chain of events for the both of them.

"What's that, an Earth rodent?"

Dib turned to where Zim was pointing. The leaves of the bushes were shaking, revealing something had taken off with speed.

"Probably. Why-" Dib didn't even have time to finish asking his question before Zim shot off, headed straight into the shrubbery. Dib stared as Zim ran. It could be a trap, but at the same time, he couldn't leave Zim alone. Who knows what trouble the Irken would cause; and whenever his nemesis causes trouble, it always seems to come back to him. So, with the hope that Gaz wouldn't doom him for being late, he followed after Zim.

Man, he'd forgotten how fast Zim could be! Chasing after the alien turned to be more of a chore than Dib thought. While Zim's body seemed to be built for chasing and fighting, Dib's wasn't. Sure, he was in shape compared to most humans, but the human body wasn't built to run at the speed an Irken's could. It wasn't long before Dib found himself straggling along, but he didn't stop, nor slow his pace. In fact, Zim seemed to be slowing his...

Dib collided with Zim's back. Apparently, the Irken hadn't just slowed; he had stopped. Zim turned around and frowned at the human, "Can't I do ANYTHING without you stalking me?"

"W-well, this could be another plan to destroy humanity!" Dib retorted. Zim looked at him as if he'd suddenly grown a second head.

"I was just following an Earth rodent... and I got a good look at it!" Dib raised both eyebrows, "It was white, and had long ears... and it was wearing a waistcoat!" Insert insane, uncontrollable Dib laughter here.

Zim scowled, and slapped the human, "Do not laugh at ZIM! It's true, I swear on the Tallest themselves!" Dib had no idea whether that was meaningful or not. Weren't the Tallest Zim's leaders?

"Listen, if it was white and had long ears, it was probably a rabbit. And rabbits don't wear waistcoats. There, mystery solved. Go home, Zim."

"NO!" Zim shouted suddenly. Dib had to cover his ears, "I will find the white rabbit and PROVE to you that it WAS wearing a waistcoat. It went down that hole!" He pointed to a rabbit hole in a nearby tree. Zim went over to the tree, and leaned down, poking his head through the tree roots, trying to see what was inside. Dib, sure he wouldn't find much, decided Zim wasn't doing anything that threatened humanity and turned around to go home.

A scream stopped him dead in his track.

Turning around, he found Zim was nowhere to be seen. How could someone just vanish like that? And that scream... it didn't sound as if he was in pain, more like he screamed out of shock or fear. He couldn't have been kidnapped or something. Dib would have noticed someone else following them. Then, he looked back at the rabbit hole.

_**No, it couldn't be... could it?**_

Dib leaned down. This was where Zim had screamed at, for sure. But it was just a rabbit hole. How could he have...?

Dib leaned to take a peak inside, and gasped. It was certainly a lot bigger than it looked! Zim must have fallen down there... good. Less work for Dib. No more alien invader, no more taking over the world, no more stopping him from taking over the world. If he went and fell down a rabbit hole, well good riddance!

Dib turned around to leave, but froze in his track. Without Zim, what would he do? Sure, he could study REAL science, but that was boring! He could hunt other supernatural creatures, but it wasn't likely he'd find one. Plus, Dib was a hero. Didn't that mean he should help people in need? ...even if that person was an alien invader whom he had hated for what feels like forever. Sighing, Dib turned around. Curse his conscience!

Slowly, very carefully, Dib slid himself down into the rabbit hole, and allowed himself to fall...

**Short, and probably not that good, but it get's better! ...Hopefully.**


	2. Shrinking and Growing

**Disclaimer: IZ and Alice in Wonderland do not belong to me**

Freefall.

That's what Dib thought as the light disappeared above him. He's freefalling into what could be an alien trap. And for what? An enemy that was probably tricking him? There was probably a trap at the bottom. Or worse: nothing. He would simply hit the ground and die. Yeah, pleasant thoughts, Dib.

What surprised Dib was the lights he passed on the way down. Even with the light of the world above disappearing, there were still -and here's the odd thing- **_street lights_** lighting the way down the impossibly long rabbit hole. Now that he thought about it, he never had seen that rabbit. This could very well be a trap.

Of course, all thought drained out of his head when he passed books, assorted furniture, and a piano on his way down. All these things are impossible! Surely this is some illusion. Like that one time Zim made him live out a possible future just to determine if he threw a muffin at said Irken. Had Dib ever mentioned Zim was nuts? Surely, he's mentioned it.

Dib saw the ground rapidly approaching. There was no trap; no Zim. Just a hole to the far left of the floor. Way too far for Dib to reach. He'd just have to shut his eyes and hope death wasn't to painful. He also hoped Gaz wouldn't bring him back to life just to doom him for not walking her home. THAT would be a nightmare.

And he hit the floor.

Actually, to be more precise, he crashed through the floor, leaving a second gaping hole behind. The boy crashed through the floor to a second floor that didn't crack. Or to be more precise... a ceiling. Dib only barely registered the chandelier dangling next to him when he fell from the ceiling to the floor he crashed through.

Ouch.

Dib waited a moment for his limbs to adjust to the shock, then picked himself off the floor. Surprisingly enough, his body wasn't in much -or **_any_**, now that he thought about it- pain from the fall and collision he just suffered. Normally, that kind of shock would have killed a person! Where Dib was, it completely disregarded the laws of reality. Curious.

Now Dib got a good look at the room he had -quite literally- broken into. The walls were white; the floors had a checkerboard pattern. Doors alined the curious corridor. A table stood in the middle of the room. Not paying attention to anything else, Dib walked over to a door and tried to open it. Locked.

So he tried the next one. Same results.

This continued on until Dib finally realized that every door was locked. Somewhat depressed, he looked to the table for the first time and found a key on top of it. He frowned at his own stupidity and picked it up. A bit wary, he tried the key in the first hole; it didn't work. And the next one...

Finally, it unlocked a door only a mouse could get through.

_**Well, that really helps, **_Dib thought sarcastically. It was then he noticed a second item on the table; a bottle with the label 'Drink Me'. Dib set the key on the table, and looked the bottle over. He wasn't the trusting kind, and this seemed way too suspicious to be true. **_Well, one sip couldn't hurt... _**

Dib took a sip of the bottle, and set it back down on the table. What happened next was simply impossible. Dib watched in amazement as everything around him grew at an exponential rate. Then it occurred to him that the room wasn't growing; he was shrinking. And so it would seem, that was true. Now, he was the size of a mouse; the perfect size to go through the door.

However, once he reached it, he found the door had relocked itself. And the key was on top of the table. Which he could no longer reach. Great. Just his luck, in a sense.

Dib wandered back over to the table, when he spotted something. It looked like... cake? Yes, cake was stationed at the bottom of the table, with the instruction 'eat me' written on it. Dib took it, unsure what he should do, before he bit into it twice. The effect was almost immediate. Dib grew to twice the size he was before, crowding the room and forcing himself to crouch in the corner. Right now, he was really hoping Zim couldn't see him; he was already teased about having a big head, he didn't need this added to that.

A solution popped into Dib's head. _**If two bites turned me into a giant, then one sip will turn me back to normal! **_Hopefully his math wasn't wrong. And it proved to be not, as one sip of the concoction on the table turned him to his normal size. Grinning, he took the key, as well as another quick sip of the strange potion, and unlocked the door.

Whatever be behind it was a mystery, but Dib was ready for whatever traps Zim might have laid.

**DONE! As for Dib's clothing... well, Alice didn't need a clothing change until she met the hatter, am I right?**


	3. Welcome to Wonderland!

**Disclaimer: IZ and Alice in Wonderland do not belong to me. Nor does iCarly (Slight reference)**

**APOLOGY: Sorry I haven't uploaded in so long... I should have planned this out first...**

For the first time in his life, Dib began questioning his sanity.

Why? Well, for starters, his alien nemesis just fell down a rabbit hole... and he had followed. Whats more, said rabbit hole was at least a mile deep... and ended with him crashing through the floor of a room, landing on the ceiling, falling back onto the floor, and coming out completely unharmed. Then, he drank a liquid that made him shrink, and ate cake that made him grow. And now...

Now, he was in some sort of forest area.

A forest wasn't quite accurate -the area seemed too big for that- but really there wasn't any other word for it. Trees were abundant and strange plants he'd never see anywhere else were in every direction. And to make matters worse, he was lost.

When he'd entered the forest, Dib had found Zim's contacts and wig on the westward path -or at least, he thought it was westward- and headed that way. But it was hard to stay on path, and he found himself hopelessly lost in this land where the laws of science were idle playthings.

"I am SO gonna need therapy for this. Where am I, anyway?"

"That's depends; where do you want to be?" Dib spun around, finding a strange cat with a stripped patterned fur. It stared at him with unusually blue eyes. What was more creepy than it's sudden appearance and eyes was it's smile. It's toothy, impossibly wide smile. The paranormal investigator stared up at it.

"I... why is that relevant?" Annoyance was clearly present in his voice.

The cat climbed to it's feet and jumped to a lower branch. "Why is anything relevant? All knowledge is important, is it not? Even the knowledge that doesn't exist."

Now Dib was just confused. "How can something that doesn't exist be important?"

"How do you know we really exist? How are you not sure we're the idle playthings of some idiot children who make us do things we'd never do?"

"Look," Dib tried -and failed- to hide his confusion, "I just want to find Zim. Green skin, red eyes, antennae, ring any bells?"

"Hmm," the cat raised it's tail to it's chin in what was probably mock thought, "Are you sure he's here?"

"Yes!"

"My, my, you're late for tea; better get moving!" And before Dib's eyes, the strange cat-like creature -no way that thing was a real cat- vanished into thin air.

"Note to self: Never take directions from a cat." Dib stated as he walked away from the tree where he saw the cat.

* * *

From that point on, Dib tried everything he could to figure this out, but asking for help from the obviously insane residents of this place was unavoidable. So, swallowing his pride and praying he wouldn't see that cat again, he went off in search of anyone who could help him.

So while traveling in hopes of running into someone, he came to a fork in the road. Dib looked at them both, wondering aloud, "Which way do I go...?"

"Why, that way, of course!" Dib turned with wide eyes to his left, where a round boy with strange clothing approached. He stood next to the sign on the right, and pointed to the path it corresponded with.

"No, this way!" Dib turned, only to find the exact twin of this strange boy leaning on the opposite sign, pointing to the opposite path.

"No, that way!"

"No, this way!"

"QUIET!" Dib bellowed. The boys looked at him. "Alright, I don't want directions, I want answers. Where are we? Who are you? Have you seen a green little alien wearing pink?" He almost slapped himself; that sounded insane. However, the two glanced at each other before addressing him.

"I'm Tweedle Dee." The one on the left said.

"I'm Tweedle Dum." His twin continued.

Then, in union, they said "And this is WONDERLAND!"

Dib raised an eyebrow. "Wonderland?" Well, he'd ask more about this when he found Zim. "Whatever, have you seen the alien?"

"Yes, he went that way!" One -Tweedle Dum?- said, pointing down the path closest to him.

"No," The other one -Tweedle Dee?- immediately disagreed. "He went THIS way!" He pointed down the other path.

The two began arguing, and Dib just shrugged it off, played 'eenie meanie miney moe', and choose a random path. He left behind the Tweedle twins, wondering if everyone in 'Wonderland' was as insane as the three he'd already met.

**Sadly, Dib, that's probably true. Again, sorry this took me so long to write... I procrastinated. **


	4. Tea for Three, Make That Four

**Disclaimer: IZ and Alice in Wonderland do not belong to me.**

Things became a lot easier once Dib found the path. It was made poorly of stone, and looked old, but it was the first one since he entered this insane place, so he took it. Why did weird things always happen to him? Oh, wait. That's Zim's fault. Why was he cursed with the burden of responsibility for that insane alien? Wait, again. He kinda choose it.

His thoughts were interrupted by the sound of nearby chatter. Several voices, though most he didn't recognize, one stood out in particular...

"Zim!" Dib ran through the brush, careful only of potentially tripping, and stumbled out into an empty clearing. Here, he was greeted by the most bizarre sight he'd found since arriving in this insane place. Forget disappearing cats, twins who never agree on anything, white rabbits in waistcoats, and a mile long drop to the bottom of a rabbit hole.

Officially, the weirdest thing he'd ever seen was Zim, a man wearing a tall hat, and a rabbit sitting around a table, sipping tea. Zim wasn't in his disguise, which made the sight all the more odd.

The human boy was first seen by the rabbit. "My dear boy, you're late for TEA!" At the last word, he stood and flung his teacup at Dib. The human barely had the time to dodge it, throwing himself to the ground. The next one to notice him was Zim.

"Dib-human?" He stared, and after a moment, put his left hand up in a stop gesture towards the rabbit, who was holding another teacup in a throwing position. "No more throwing things, friend. He's with me."

The boy picked himself up off the ground as Zim approached. "Why did you help me?" He looked up to the Irken, searching his cold face for a response. Zim did nothing, but his ruby eyes searched the human. After a moment, he wiped some dirt off of Dib's shirt and smiled brightly.

"Because," He purposely sounded like a little kid, "Now, come join us for tea. I'll introduce you to the group." He sat down where he was, and forced Dib into the seat next to him. "This is the March Hare. Sorry about the teacup, by the way." He gestured to the rabbit. "And our host is the Mad Hatter. He's pretty cool. He's the one who brought me here." He gestured to the man in the top hat at the end of the table. He offered Dib a smile.

"Zim... what IS this place, anyways?" Zim grinned, standing on the table and gesturing all around him with over-exaggerated arm and hand movements.

"THIS, human, is Underland! The place where EVERYONE is insane! Not a boring day goes by in this wondrous land!" Well, Dib mused, at least he got the 'Everyone is insane' part right. Zim continued, "This place is AMAZING! No one calls you crazy when you stand on the table and rant, everyone wears wacky clothing, and all the people here are not stupid. Kinda like you."

"Err..." Dib wasn't sure whether that was an insult or compliment. He took it as a compliment. "Thank you?"

Apparently it was a compliment, because Zim nodded and continued. "They saw through my disguise almost immediately. March Hare pulled my wig off, and while that distracted me, the Mad Hatter got my contacts. Luckily, they told me it made no difference and invited me for tea." The alien's grin was as wide as it could get. "Dib, these people are AMAZING. Who cares if they're crazy? They don't care whether I'm Irken or human!" The alien sighed. "I'm really at home here."

"Yeah, that's great." Dib mumbled. So now what? Zim stayed here and Dib went home? That would mean he'd come all this way for nothing. He then remembered something. "Wait, Underland? I thought it was 'Wonderland."

This time, the Mad Hatter answered his question. "Wonderland? You must've been talking to the Tweedle twins. They can't pronounce anything right," He sighed. "Oh well."

"So... besides crazy twins, talking animals, and mad hatters, what else does this place have?" The March Hare poured some tea into Dib's cup. He took a moment to drink it. The Hatter sighed.

"Well, there is the Red Queen..."

"Who?" Zim asked, obviously just as curious as Dib. At home or not, Zim was a scientist, and had the curiosity to prove it.

Both the Hatter and Hare exchanged a worried glance. Then, the Hatter continued, "She's an insane tyrant. She took over with brute force, and rules with an Iron Fist and a large head. We've been trying to overthrow her for years."

Zim and Dib exchanged a glance. So Underland was more than what it appeared. "Who's supposed to rule this place, anyways?" Dib asked. Just out of curiosity.

"The White Queen." Here, the two insane creatures turned their moods up. "She's fair and kind and just, and she has a normal sized head. Though mostly incomparable, the two are related... I think." The Hatter stroked his chin in thought.

Dib wanted to say something, suggest attack plans, but Zim appeared in his line of view and shook his green head no. So the two just sat their, occasionally sipping tea, as the Hare and the Hatter continued to talk about the war and the two Queens. The only thing either could tell for sure was that they didn't like the Red Queen.

All of a sudden, Zim slammed his teacup down. He looked around with wide eyes. "Did anyone else here that?"

"You're being paranoid, Zim," Dib pointed out, reaching for his own cup, when he heard it; the sound of clinking armor. Before he was given any time to comprehend anything, Zim shoved him under the table. From his wayward position, he heard Zim ask:

"May we help you?"

**CLIFFHANGER! Yes, I hate these. But they're kinda inevitable, when you think about it. Also, it's getting kinda late. Why do I write better in the dark?**

**Also, to minimize confusion for myself (I only saw the movie twice), all Wonderland characters will be referred to by their generic names. (March Hare, Mad Hatter, etc.)**


	5. Zim Gets Captured!

**Disclaimer: IZ and Alice in Wonderland do not belong to you.**

"May we help you?"

Zim's words echoed through the ears of Dib. Hidden under the table, nobody could see him. The curious side of him took over, and he managed to discreetly look out from under the table cloth. Guards in the form of playing cards -all hearts- were surrounding the table he was hiding under. When his brain began functioning, he decided they must be servants of the red queen.

The only one that stood out was a human like character in armor; he seemed to be leader of this platoon of cards. He was also the one who responded to Zim's question. "The Red Queen has been informed of newcomers to Underland, and we have come to arrest them and take them into custody." He eyed Zim. "I've never seen you here before..."

"Have you looked for me?" Zim countered, sipping his tea. Dib smiled. His psycho personality made him fit in perfectly here.

The man in armor stared at him. "Uh, no..."

"Then you probably missed me. It's happened before; no big deal." The Invader responded coolly, once again sipping his tea. The man sneered.

"Well, whatever, but sources have shown that a boy wearing black with a sword on his head had come to Wonderland," Here, Dib suppressed a scream. Who had told? The cat? The twins? Or some unseen character?

The hatter stared, unimpressed, at the stranger. "Do you mind? We are trying to drink our tea in peace." To demonstrate, he brought the cup of steaming liquid to his face and sipped. The man wrinkled his face in disgust.

"How can you people drink that disgusting stuff? Oh well. Farewell, pig-nosed imbeciles." The man in armor rode marched off, his soldiers following. Once the coast was clear, Dib resurfaced.

"Who were they?" He asked the Hatter. Said hatter frowned, looking into his tea as though he was watching something through it. Dib wouldn't be surprised if that were true.

"They are the Red Queen's royal servants. Well, not really. Rather, they're loyal to her power. If given the opportunity, they'd rebel. The one leading them is the only one truly loyal to her royal pain: the Knave of Hearts." The March Hare shuttered. "They came here on the Red Queen's orders. You must have REALLY made her mad somehow."

Dib panicked. "I didn't even know she EXISTED until several minutes ago! How could I make her mad? Why would she want to kill me?" Zim calmly stood, walked over to Dib, and slapped him.

"GET A GRIP, HUMAN!" Then he turned to the others. "We'll go for a walk. He needs to calm down." The two nodded, somewhat calm, before Zim pulled Dib and himself down to the ground to avoid being hit by a flying teacup. The two took off.

In the forest, the two stopped by the lake. Dib splashed the cool water on his face, while Zim watched from the side, keeping his distance from the water. The two sat, immersed in total silence, until Dib broke it. "So... you're not going home?"

Zim stared at him. "Dib, you may not believe this but... I LIKE it here. Here, I'm not crazy; here, nobody tells me what to do; here... being Irken doesn't matter." Dib gave him a sympathetic glance.

"You know... maybe being crazy isn't such a bad thing. We're both crazy." Zim and Dib looked up at each other, meeting eyes. Zim's held a sadness Dib didn't know the alien could feel.

The two stood in silence until Zim walked over, getting as close as he could to Dib, and...

Pushed him into the water.

Turns out, the pond was deeper than he thought. Dib sunk a few feet, before kicking and swinging his arms, desperate for air. When he reached the surface, he noticed the card guards putting handcuffs on Zim before leading him away. Once they were out of sight, Dib surfaced.

He couldn't find them; that was strange, as he only disappeared a moment ago. He swam to shore, ringed the water out of his scythe hair, and looked around. The woods showed no signs of either the alien or the guards.

It was official. He was alone, and Zim was gone.

**SHORTER than I wanted! But I got everything I needed to down. Remember, this one is meant as FRIENDSHIP! And I've seen some pretty close to the line stuff.**

**I'm gonna go eat something. Later.**


	6. Dib Looks Ridiculous

**Disclaimer: IZ and Alice in Wonderland do not belong to me.**

Dib was panicking.

No, scratch that; Dib was plain _freaking out_. As soon as his brain registered the two present facts -that Zim had been captured and he was alone- he began running around in circles, screaming his oversized head off.

This was the state the Mad Hatter and March Hare found him in. The two, growing bored with waiting, left to find them and heard Dib screaming, locating him in this state. They exchanged a glance, before the Hatter stuck out his foot casually, tripping Dib. The human boy fell forward, rolling on the ground before coming to a stop centimeters from the pond.

He stood, shaking his head. "I'm fine. I'm okay!" Dib then turned to the hare and hatter. "Hey, when did you two get here?"

This time, the glance they exchanged was an annoyed one. "Just what happened, my boy?" The Hatter asked in a strangely sane voice.

"T-they took him!" Dib exclaimed, trying not to break. Anyone who looked at him could tell he was failing. "He pushed me into the pond and the cards came and took him away! I don't even know why!"

The Hare inspected him. "Well, that would explain why you're wet." He noted.

"There has to be SOMETHING we can do!" The human was on the verge of tears. Never in his young life had he been so scared. Not even when Zim was going to take out his organs. At least he knew what was going on then. But this place was so insane he wasn't sure if it was even _real_.

The two natives scratched under their chins simultaneously. It was actually an amusing sight, as the two of them were back to back. Dib noticed, but was way too panicked to care. Unable to keep still, he twiddled his thumbs while the two idiots thought.

Eventually, Hatter came up with an idea. "You could always infiltrate the Red Queen's palace..." He trailed off. Dib scoffed.

"Yeah, right. I can imagine that now. 'Hi, Red Queen. I'm Dib, and-' 'Throw him into the dungeons!'" He made a sound meant to imitate the sound of a jail cell after he finished.

"Actually," The Hare told him, "She'd be more likely to say, 'Off with his head!'"

Dib paled. "And that's supposed to make me feel better... how?"

"Well, got any better ideas?" The hatter asked. "Because if we don't do anything, you're friends head is gonna end up floating in the castle moat, right next to the Red King's." Both hare and hatter shuttered, as though suppressing an old, better forgotten memory. Dib himself couldn't picture Zim's decapitated head floating in some moat... it would disintegrate first.

Finally, the human sighed. "I'm in... what do we do now?"

* * *

Apparently, a disguise was the first step.

"You'll need to exchange your dark clothes for red ones." The Hatter said. "I can make a hat to hide your hair sword. The fact that you've got a big head will probably help; the Queen loves to surround herself with people with freakishly large body parts. The bigger the better."

"My heads not big!" Dib snapped, but allowed the Mad man to take his measurements. Hours later, he was clothed in a red suit with a red and white hat. The human also wore a sullen stare.

"I feel ridiculous."

"Yeah, but you look like a servant of the Red Queen! She'll probably welcome you with open arms!"

"Hopefully," Dib muttered.

"Now, we'll have the White Rabbit escort you to the palace. He's the messenger of Wonderland; he can come and go as he pleases."

"So there WAS a white rabbit?" Dib asked, half-groaning. "Great. Now I gotta listen to Zim say, 'I told you so!'"

When the White Rabbit finally arrived, the two took off. He waved to the Hare and Hatter.

"Wait!"

The Hatter ran catching up with the two quickly; they hadn't gotten very far. "Once you rescue Zim, report to the White Queen's palace. We'll be waiting there; it's too risky to hang around here."

Dib nodded, taking off once again. He didn't know how or why, but he was going to save Zim, or die trying. After all, who said a hero's job is easy?

**Yay! I got inspiration! Blame the thunderstorm; I don't know why.**

**It just isn't a IZ fiction unless someone makes fun of Dib's head...**


	7. The Lair of the Beast

**Disclaimer: IZ and Alice in Wonderland don't belong to me.**

Dib gulped nervously. "A-are you sure this is the place?"

The White Rabbit responded with a glare. "Yes, I'm sure. Don't track any mud, don't do anything stupid, and try to get out as fast as possible." With these final warnings he headed off, leaving Dib to infiltrate the castle himself.

Finding a way in wasn't as hard as one would think it was. Getting across the moat wasn't as tough as he imagined; just a little gross. He had to row across in a hollowed out log. Then getting inside. The outer wall had stones jutting out, making for random footholds and grabbing ledges so he could climb over. When he finally got over it, he was almost wistful; he expected this to be a little more challenging.

Of course, this was before he saw the Red Queen.

She had a large head -much larger than his- and frizzy red hair. Her gown was red, with white hearts going down the front. The top was a black shirt with a golden overcoat. The sleeves matched the rest of the top. She carried a scepter, the color golden, and wore a golden crown atop her oversized head. When getting a good look at her face, Dib thought he was looking at a clown.

Along with a string of advisers she probably didn't know the names of, the Queen was playing a game of croquet. With flamingos as the mallets and hedgehogs as the balls. The guards randomly made paths for the Queen, but they always moved so she would win every time. He watched a few games, having the misfortune to see what happened when one of the guards DIDN'T move.

"He caused me to lose!" The Queen shouted. Everyone gasped. "OFF WITH HIS HEAD!" More guards came, carrying the poor man away. Dib, unfortunately, chose this moment to fall off the wall he was sitting on, crashing into the courtyard. Everyone stopped to stare at him.

"Uh... oops."

"YOU!" The Queen shouted, and Dib was sure for a moment he had blown it. Then she continued. "Why are you here? I don't recall inviting you!"

Dib remembered something the Hatter mentioned; she loved to be complimented. "I just came to see the legendary Red Queen herself! You're more beautiful then the rumors said!" Later, Dib would rinse his mouth out with soap for that comment, but for now, he just bit back all laughter and prayed she would not see through his lie, as her advisers clearly did; they were trying not to laugh.

Her majesty's stern gaze turned to one of narcissism. "Thank you, young man. Though you're a little too young for my taste... who are you?"

Well, since she didn't know his name yet... "My name is Dib. I'm from the farlands." He prayed she wouldn't ask any questions.

"Well, Dib of the Farlands, I shall inform you that anyone with a head your size is welcome in my court." Dib bit back the instinctive reply of 'My head's not big!'.

Dib noticed out of the corner of his eye the Knave, eying him like he was eying trouble. As if he knew something, which Dib prayed wasn't true. He then noticed the Queen informing one of her entourage that he would be escorting Dib around the palace. Nodding, he grabbed Dib by the elbow and led him away.

The two walked, the large-nosed guide informing Dib of things he'd need to know, when Dib asked what was in the large tower. For one thing, the man was flabbergasted. "I-I-I, uh-"

"Tell me, or I tell the Queen that your large nose is fake." To emphasize his threat, he pulled the fake nose off, causing it to land on the ground. With a scurry, the man picked it up and reattached it to his face.

"Alright! The Queen's Jabberwocky is up there!"

"Jabberwocky?"

"Her source of power! Everyone follows her because that thing is loyal to her, and nobody wants to become Jabberwock food!" He glanced around nervously, before regaining his composure. "Tell anyone about the fake nose, and I'll make sure you see the beast in person." With that, he walked off.

"Wait!" Dib called. He stopped, turning around.

"What?"

"Where are the prisoners?"

"The dungeon downstairs, nitwit!"

Thanking the man, Dib walked towards the downward staircase he had seen only moments prier, only to have his sleeve grabbed by someone. Almost fearing to, he turned around to find himself face to face with the Knave. "Hey, uh, how's it going dude?"

"The Queen wants to see you... dude." And with those words, he walked off. Something about that man made Dib uncomfortable. He knew something, Dib was now sure of it.

He looked wistfully back at the staircase. So much for getting Zim and getting out of here.

**Okay... I really have nothing to say. Not really, anyways. Uh, review?**

**And don't forget to tip your waitresses!**


	8. We Meet Again, My Earthly Foe

**Disclaimer: IZ and Alice in Wonderland do not belong to me.**

"Ah, Dib," The Red Queen greeted him, while ushering him into the room. "Welcome to my throne chamber. This is where I tell people they're going to have their heads cut off." She grinned fondly, as though reminiscing. The Queen was increasingly reminding him of his sister. Creepy.

Dib just smiled politely and nodded. "How interesting, your majesty. But why did you want to see me?"

"The new prisoners are coming in to be judged. I thought you might want to sit and watch while I tell them they're going to be beheaded." She said this as though it was merely a hobby. For her, it probably was. The guards around looked slightly relaxed. Now he knew this was a hobby. It must put her in a good mood. Why else would the guards be at ease?

The guards carried prisoners in and out of the throne room. One or two got banished, a few got sent to the dungeons, but for most she shouted, 'Off with your head!'. Each time she did, Dib flinched away from her, hand on his ear. Her voice was shrill and loud, making him cringe. He put up with it, though. He needed to know where Zim was to break him out of here.

"Is that all the prisoners?" The Red Queen asked after one had been carried off. He was going to be pardoned, but made the mistake of mentioning the White Queen. Though he meant to insult her, apparently any mention of her was forbidden in the palace walls, because she stopped the trial, screamed, 'Off with his head!', and Dib had a feeling no one would hear from that man ever again.

The guard looked down at a list, then back up at the Queen. "Just one more we found resisting your superior rule in the forests surrounding your kingdom alongside that insane milliner and his psychotic rabbit friend." Dib muttered 'hare' under his breath, but no one seemed to notice. "We've brought him back for your judging, your grace."

"Very well," She sighed, "Bring him in."

The doors opened, and two guards led our favorite alien in. Zim squirmed in their grasps, attempting to get away from them. He stopped struggling when he laid eyes on Dib, instead staring in shock at the human boy. Dib shook his head, as if to tell him to keep quiet. Zim somehow picked up on this, and nodded subtly.

The Queen gazed at Zim, her expression unimpressed. "He's green. What a hideous color." Her stare hardened as she got up and walked around. "And he wears a dress. Just who are you?"

Zim grinned from ear to non-existent ear. "I am Zim, Invader for the Irken armada. I have come to this strange land to offer, to it's almighty leader, the tactics of the best army in the universe."

The knave, who had been leaning against the wall, stepped forward. "Why would you want to give anything to us?" He snarled, staring the captured Irken dead in the eye.

Said Irken swallowed whatever fears bubbled to the surface, and proclaimed, "We have been looking for an ally. Someone with poise, grace, and someone who's clever. From what I've heard... that's you."

The Queen smiled, then frowned again. "But you're still odd-looking. For that, you must work from the prison cells. DISMISSED!" The guards nodded, escorting Zim out of the room. Dib watched until he was long gone. Even then, he was pulled out of the trance by the Queen. "Now, I shall be going! Ruling an entire kingdom is tiresome. Farewell, Dib. Feel free to explore." And with that, the queen took off, at least five guards following her exit. The knave stared at Dib for a while, then followed.

Once he was sure they were gone, Dib took off towards the dungeon. He needed to get this done, and fast.

* * *

The cells weren't very big. Each one seemed large enough to accommodate one person. Zim's cell was the farthest one down from the stairwell, something Dib was both grateful for and annoyed with. He walked down, occasionally peering around for guards, and reached Zim's cell. The Irken didn't look up. He just sighed, sitting there. "So, you've come. I knew you would."

"You mad?" He asked. Zim sighed again, shaking his head no.

"Not mad, just... confused. Why are you here?" Zim looked up to his Earthen foe. Ruby eyes met Dib's own, and the human found himself at a loss. Why did he come here? Guilt? Heroism? A desire to be killed? Or something else? Right now, that wasn't important. Dib shook his head.

"Never mind that," He remarked. "We need to get out of here as soon as we can! Who knows what that psychopath could do to us if she found out."

Zim shook his head. "You've heard of the Jabberwocky, right?" Dib nodded, still wondering why the beast was so fearsome. "According to the Hatter -who told me the most delightful stories- only a sword possessed by the Royal family could defeat such a creature. You've got to find this Vorpal Sword and free deliver it to the White Queen! It's the only way to beat her!"

"You've gotta be kidding me!" Dib exclaimed. "No way I can do that! Besides, this isn't my responsibility! You are, so I've gotta save you, but not this entire place."

Zim's expression was surprisingly serious for the Irken. "Dib, listen to me. These people are suffering -not just that, _dying_- at the hands of the Red Queen. You would let them suffer?" He looked down. "At least get the sword. Then, I'll go back willingly."

Dib's mouth fell slightly in shock. According to Zim, this was paradise... and he was going to give it up for a sword? Maybe there was more to the Irken then Dib gave him credit for. After all, before this they could only try to stop each other and further their own goals. Now that those goals didn't exist, it was almost scary how alike they were.

The human looked down. "Okay. But I won't take too long. If I can't find it by tomorrow evening, then I'll drag you out of here." Zim nodded.

"That seems fair. I'll be waiting." The two nodded to each other, as Dib left. So far, things were not going according to plan... but maybe he could make them better. After all, when your goals don't turn out the way you plan, don't you make new ones?

**I'm sorry, that ending was just weak. But I'm tired, and I need to play-through ToS again to continue my_ Devil's Arms_ story, so that's keeping me busy. I feel like an idiot...**

**Uh, well, bye!**


	9. How To Train Your Bandersnatch

**Disclaimer: IZ and Alice in Wonderland do not belong to me.**

"ARG!"

Dib growled at nothing. All day he had spent searching for that sword, and no sign of it! Not anywhere in the castle. And it's not like he could ask around about it without looking suspicious. It's all Zim's fault! If he would just come... Dib thought. But he knew Zim could be especially stubborn when it comes to something he cares about.

The sensation of something falling into his grasp pulled him out of his thoughts. "Take this to the bandersnatch cage. Hope you don't get eaten." Dib looked up, and glared at the sight of the knave. Of course. But there was one problem with that...

"I don't know where the cage is."

"It's right over there." The Knave pointed to something that looked like a shed.

The human stared at it. "Wait, if it's right over there, then why don't you do it?"

"Because I don't feel like getting eaten." The Knave responded coolly. "Have fun, brat." Dib glared at him as he left.

Grudgingly, Dib lugged the bale of food towards the door. After opening the unlocked door, Dib had the unfortunate experience of seeing a bandersnatch close up. In a way, it looked like a large dog. It's fur was gray, with dark spots over the body. It had short, triangular ears and sharp, long fangs. Upon seeing Dib, it growled.

"Nice bandersnatch... good bandersnatch..." Dib muttered as he approached it. The thing watched intently as Dib dropped the bale of food. He backed up intently, but stopped upon seeing something on the wall. It could only be the Vorpal sword. Dib swallowed his fear of the lupine and attempted to cross the cage.

The bandersnatch growled menacingly. As it turns out, giant canines don't like humans invading their territories. Who knew?

Dib jumped back, away from the beast. How was he supposed to get past this thing? It was huge! And on top of that, it seemed to have a desire for human flesh. But... the resistance needed that sword. He would have to brave this thing.

He approached, slowly. With every step, the beast seemed to grow louder. Dib was thankful for the collar keeping it chained to the wall. But he would have to come in range of it to get the sword. Gulping, Dib stole forward.

The bandersnatch growled loudly, pouncing forward and attempting to maim Dib with it's bare claws. Out of pure surprise, Dib jumped back. The claw had struck his shoulder, tearing through his shirt and most likely scarring his shoulder.

Lightly brushing his fingers against the wound, and wincing at the pain just that caused, Dib stared at the large lupine and noticed something wrong with it's paw. A large splinter of wood was sticking out. Despite his wound, Dib felt sorry for it. He slowly move forward. At the last moment, he darted forward, pulling it from the paw. The beast howled, knocking Dib backwards.

A moment later, Dib picked himself up and brushed the dirt off of himself. The bandersnatch was no longer angry looking. Instead, it stared patiently at him. Dib slowly approached yet again, and recoiled when it lower it's head towards him. Instead of biting him, though, it licked the wound on his shoulder.

Dib smiled at the creature, petting it behind the ear. Now that it wasn't threatening to kill him, it really wasn't that bad. A quick glance to his shoulder revealed the wound was already healing. By morning it would be all healed. Probably.

"Will you let me past?" Dib asked the lupine. It moved to allow Dib to pass it. Underneath the sword, Dib reached up and found he couldn't reach it. He frowned. Maybe there was a stool or something he could use to get up there.

As it turns out, he didn't need a stool. The bandersnatch lower itself down, and used it's paw to put Dib on it's back. It then raised itself up to full height. From there, Dib could easily reach the sword. He pulled it off the wall, and jumped off the bandersnatch.

The human turned to leave, but was stopped by his own subconscious. The poor creature didn't deserve to be chained up here. It deserved to be free. Dib placed the sword on the ground, carefully, and climbed up to the bandersnatch's chain. It took little effort to release it of it's hook.

"There!" He jumped back down. "You're free!" The bandersnatch ran off, across the open drawbridge. Dib picked up the sword. Now, all he needed to do was get Zim and-

"GET HIM!"

Uh-oh.

**Uh-oh indeed, Dear Dib.**

**Thank you for reading this far. And an apology for the lateness of this particular chapter. I've been busy.**


	10. The Price of Escape

**Disclaimer: IZ and Alice in Wonderland do not belong to me.**

"GET HIM!"

The voice of the Red Queen was never sweet. It had always been shrill and cruel. Just ask anyone who had spoken to her within any time of her life. Or anyone in Wonderland, for that matter, because she is also loud. When she is angry, however, her voice becomes akin to a banshee's.

And having a prisoner who was supposed to help her win the war against her sister, the White Queen, escape, was something that would definitely put her in a bad mood.

Dib quickly hid the sword behind his back and turned in the direction the Queen was. What he saw made his jaw drop. There was Zim, the very alien he had come to rescue, running away from the Queen and her army like a chicken with it's head cut off. He wasn't screaming, but his widened eyes showed Dib just how panicked Zim was.

Without a second thought, Dib ran over to the alien invader. The Red Queen was the first to spot him.

"DIB!" The Queen cried. "Capture him! NOW!" At the mention of Dib, Zim turned his head towards his ally. Dib joined Zim, standing beside him. "What are you doing? GET HIM!"

"No," Dib responded coolly. He revealed the Vorpal Sword, previously hidden. Zim stared at him in a mixture of pride and glee. The Red Queen was fuming, her face turning a deep crimson. Dib could've sworn smoke was coming out of her ears.

"You... TRAITOR! GUARDS! SEIZE THEM!" The cards ran forward, holding their spears outward to attack them. Dib reached for the sword, but Zim's three fingered claw grabbed it before he could remove it.

Dib looked up, his surprised expression meeting Zim's surprisingly serious one. "No. Not yet. We can only use that sword to defeat the Jabberwocky." Dib nodded. They still had the problem of getting out of here, however. The two tried to make a run for it, but were stopped. They were surrounded on all sides.

A mechanical whirling sounded behind him. Dib turned around and saw Zim had taken his mechanical arms out. Hope surged through him. He'd forgotten that Zim's PAK could be a weapon as well as his life source.

The mechanical arms swept across the area in front of Zim, knocking guards in all directions. He held them poised above a couple of guards that ran forward to take the place of the ones Zim had knocked down. They froze, giving Zim the time to send them flying through the air towards the castle wall, which they crashed into.

Dib picked up the spear of one of the fallen guards, keeping them off Zim's backside. The spear collided with another, briefly locking, before knocking the guard away. He turned around and, holding the spear like a bat, knocked away the one poised to strike behind them.

Zim and Dib were doing well, but it was an already lost battle. The more they defeated, more seemed to come forward to take their place. After a while of fighting, one particularly lucky guard managed to knock the spear from Dib's hands, sending it flying. It landed, head buried in the dirt, a good ways away.

Looking back at the guard, who was posed to take another strike, Dib covered his face. And then...

Nothing happened.

Dib removed his hands from his face, seeing the guards had been knocked back. From above, Zim only spared him a brief glance before returning to the intense combat.

It wasn't too long before they were overwhelmed. The Knave had, at some point, joined the battle. He used his own sword to cut Zim's mechanical limbs off. Surprised, Zim stumbled back, falling into Dib. Luckily, the boy was prepared and caught him.

The Knave pointed his sword at the child and alien. Some subtle command neither Zim nor Dib knew nothing about. The guards ran forward, prepared to capture them. But somehow, somewhere, the universe was against that.

A growl echoed through the air. The guards' looked past the two small warriors, fear and horror etched upon their faces. Zim and Dib dared to turn around. Zim's eyes widened in terror at the sight of the bandersnatch, while Dib's widened in relief. It ran forward, licking Dib. He laughed.

"Okay... okay, stop it!" He laughed. The bandersnatch obeyed. Zim frowned, then shrugged. He grabbed Dib by the arm, pulling him closer to the bandersnatch. It growled at him. "It's okay, Zim's a friend." Dib assured it.

Zim bent down, putting his hands in front of him with the fingers interlocking. "Climb on," He commanded. Dib, not knowing what else to do, set his foot in Zim's hands. Zim lifted him up, helping him climb onto the back of the bandersnatch. The guards, meanwhile, had finally snapped out of their stupor and were running towards them.

Zim looked back at them. He then smacked the bandersnatch as hard as he could. It went running. Dib's eyes widened as he held onto the fur for his life. Once he was secure, he looked back. Zim was holding them off with a spear, but it was clear he wouldn't last long. Dib called out his name before watching as the vast numbers overwhelmed Zim.

He couldn't go back, though. They'd kill him. With a gentle command, Dib and the bandersnatch started for the White Queen's palace.

* * *

Upon arrival at the palace, Dib was greeted by several familiar faces and several he'd never seen before. The March Hare and Mad Hatter, most notably, came up to him.

"Where's Zim?" The Hatter asked. Dib sniffled slightly, wondering how to explain the death of the invader to the members of the White Queen's court.

"Zim... he..." Dib choked out. Mostly out of disbelief. Someone who he had been fighting against and, more recently, fighting with, was gone. Forever. It would take time to sink in. A bell sounded in the tower above. Dib turned to look at it, and turned around. His eyes widened in disbelief.

There, followed by a bunch of servants and prisoners from the Red Queen's castle, was Zim. He was grinning widely with triumph.

"Hey, Dib. Missed me?"

**I really, really, REALLY hope this makes up for past procrastination. I really feel like I accomplished something with this chapter, but... I couldn't tell you what, because I'm not sure.**


	11. Zim's Escapade

**Disclaimer: IZ and Alice in Wonderland do not belong to me.**

**NOTE: Majority of this chapter is in First Person, cause it was just dying to be told that way.**

"Zim!" Dib cried out in amazement. He ran over to the Irken, who climbed down from his mount on one of the creatures, "But- how- why-?"

Dib's foe chuckled, "Honestly, Dib, am I really the type of life form to just roll over and die? THINK AGAIN! Irkens are so much more superior than that."

The statement made Dib roll his eyes. Of course Zim would make it, "But still... I saw them capture you! The Queen would have had you beheaded moments after I got away, maybe an hour at most. How are you here?"

A zippered smile flashed upon the Irken's face. It seemed as if Zim had waited for this particular question, "Well... if you insist... I shall tell you the GLORIOUS story of my escape! With a little help from the lesser beings," He gestured to the group of escaped prisoners awaiting orders from someone on what to do now.

"Well then, spill," The human sat down. Zim scowled.

"Do not tell ME what to do! But I shall tell you anyways," He sat down next to Dib, "It started soon after you escaped on the bandersnatch. I was fighting for my life..."

* * *

I watched as the Dib ran away on that strange monster he somehow tamed. I didn't know or care how; the sword and he were safe. Wasn't that all that mattered?

The guards were still set on defeating me. I wasn't completely stupid; this was a fight I could not win with strength alone. The sheer mass of their numbers had already spelled out my demise. With a fleeting glance at the retreating form of the bandersnatch, I dropped my spear and held my hands up in surrender. The queen looked at me in surprise, but quickly got over it.

"Y-you impudent worm! I hereby sentence you to death! OFF WITH HIS HEAD!" The servants and guards rushed to meet her demands. I sneered. Most of them would probably go against her, had she not had that thing in the tower just above us. From the corner of my eye, I could sense it stirring, waiting for the command to be released.

Two guards grabbed me by the arm and escorted me back to the dungeon I had just broken out of. How ironic. I just got out to get put back in. Only this time, I would be taken out again for my death. I sighed, "At least Dib's got the sword. Maybe he can make things better."

"Or maybe he can't," An all too familiar voice rang out, "Maybe he had grown co-dependent on you. Maybe when you die, he'll be wracked so much with misery he'll die, too."

My eyes narrowed, "Don't you have anything better to do?" I asked the cat floating next to my cell. He only flashed that large, semi-creepy smile in response.

"What could possibly be better than helping an honest Irken avoid death?" He inquired.

I narrowed my eyes at him, "YOU want to help ME, of all people?"

He seemed to shrug, "Why not? Wonderland isn't getting any better, might as well do something myself."

An idea formed in my superior Irken cranium, "Okay, I have a plan! Here's what we need to do..."

* * *

Later, I walked out into the arena, led by two guards holding me a little too tightly for comfort by the arms. Underland's people who really did not want to be here but had no choice watched as I, the first outsider here in ages, was led to what would be my death. A -oh, what are they called?- guillotine, that's it. A guillotine was centered on top of a platform.

I situated my head in the guillotine, trying to make myself comfortable. The Queen sat on her throne, surrounded by people with ridiculously fake oversized body parts. A fake nose, fake stomach, fake ears, etc. Anyhow, the knave stood on the side of me. He fingered the lever that would end my life. I smirked. And on signal of the queen, he pulled it down.

People all around me gasped as a head fell into the basket. I stood back up, poking my real head out of my shirt, "Phew, it's stuffy in there!"

Again, they all gasped, which made me roll my eyes. The dead head lying in the basket turned back into the Cheshire Cat, floating again in midair. Like we planned, he flew up to the nobles, bumping into them and revealing their fake oversized parts.

The Queen gasped, "You lied to me! You ALL LIED! OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!"

"NAY!" I yelled up in protest, "Brothers and sisters of Underland, do you not see what she is doing! SHE is the reason you're all miserable! But the time has come! The Vorpal Sword is in the possession of the White Queen! TODAY, WE REBEL!"

Cheers roared out from the crowd. I couldn't help but smirk a little as they all ran down to help me. We would be leaving the castle as a group.

Fighting the guards was a cinch, now that I had proper back up. With a spear, we easily fought our way through them. When I met the Knave, I didn't hesitate to slash him with my spear, sending him down to the ground.

"FOOL!" I told him, "I AM ZIM! BOW BEFORE MY SUPERIORITY!" And then, just for good measure, I spat in his face.

I jumped atop one of the escaping creatures. Riding him, we made our way here in record speed. Where I saw you talking to the White Rabbit. But you know the story from there.

* * *

"Uh, wow," Dib stated, "That's pretty impressive. And I'm glad I'm not the only one who finds that cat disturbing."

Out of nowhere, the cat materialized next to Zim, "You were saying?"

Dib jumped and screamed. Zim couldn't suppress his snickering.

**I just couldn't help that last part. I wanted to end this chapter on a good note. And I fully admit it was mostly an excuse to focus on Zim.**


	12. The White Queen and the Prophecy

**Disclaimer: IZ and Alice in Wonderland do not belong to me.**

Dib and Zim walked back inside the castle together. Neither were quite sure where the cat had gone off to, but then again, neither could really say they cared, either. They were more concerned about the creatures gather around the castle courtyard, murmuring in excitement.

It didn't take them too long to find someone they knew. The Hatter was in the center of the crowd, grinning happily alongside the March Hare. He turned around and grinned at the two of them, "Hallelujah, brothers, hallelujah!"

"What's everyone so excited about?" Dib asked. The Hatter grinned, grabbing Dib's arms and starting to spin around in a circle, laughing while Dib screamed. He screamed because the Hatter had lifted him off the ground while spinning.

"We're so excited because the White Queen is giving us an audience! She's on her way here right now!" The March Hare was giddy with excitement as well. He jumped six feet into the air, then grabbed Zim and threw him upwards. A trumpet caught everyone's attention, including his. They all stopped and turned towards the direction the trumpet's sound had come from. Zim fell face first into the ground.

As the trumpet stopped, the White Rabbit stepped out onto a stage in front of the crowd. He cleared his throat, before announcing loudly, "Presenting her Grace, the true ruler of Underland, The White Queen!"

If the crowd had been excited before, they were now stirred and riled so much it reminded Dib of the rock concert Gaz had dragged him to. Everyone cheered as loudly as they could. A woman walked onto stage. She possessed a white dress, white hair, skin so pale it almost looked white... oh, who was he kidding? Everything about her screamed, 'White Queen right here folks!'

Yet at the same time, Dib could get why they admired her so much. On her face, despite everything the Red Queen had put them through, was a small, kind smile. She seemed to dance onto the stage. At the same time, her eyes masked a worry and concern that Dib had seen somewhere else, but couldn't place. Only Zim recognized the determination to protect one's home and people that was present in both Dib and the White Queen.

She greeted the inhabitants of Underland with a bright smile and the waving of her hands. She possessed poise and grace, something her counterpart, the Red Queen, seemed to have neither of. The Queen walked to the center of the stage and blew a kiss into the air for her people.

Now that the initiation was over, she managed to call over the crowd's noise, "Attention, my people!"

The crowd hushed in an instant.

"Today is a day of reckoning! It is a day to be celebrated for years and years to come! Today is the day the Vorpal Sword has been delivered unto us by a hero! That young boy who brought the weapon that will save us is Dib of the Humans! Dib, come up here!"

The world seemed to be staring at him. It took a push from Zim to get Dib's feet moving again. He walked onto center stage, to the awaiting queen. She smiled kindly at his shy reluctance, "This boy has brought the Vorpal Sword to us from the Red Queen! We owe him our freedom and our gratitude."

The crowd cheered for Dib, though not nearly as loudly as they had for the queen. He blushed at the attention.

"Dib, where is the sword?"

"Oh yeah," Dib forgot he had left it attached to his new found friend. He whistled, "Clem!"

Everyone ran out of the way in panic as the bandersnatch ran through, carrying the sword on his newly attached saddle. He jumped onto the stage, skidding to a stop. Dib pet him before taking the sword.

He then looked back to the queen. Instead of looking upset or angry, as he had assumed she would, she seemed amused, "Well... that was interesting. Now, give to me the sword, please."

Dib obliged, kneeling down before her and presenting the sword. She took it into her hands, cradling it carefully. She then held it above her head. The people all in the crowd cheered again. Zim whistled, making Dib roll his eyes.

"And now, the Oraculum shall tell us who the Champion is!"

"The Oraculum?" Zim whispered to the Hatter.

Hatter nodded, whispering back, "It's the ancient scroll which predicts the future. The prophet of Wonderland wrote it a while back. It will reveal the identity of the Queen's Champion, who will wield the sword in battle and defeat the Red Queen's Jabberwocky."

"Oh," Zim replied. He didn't speak anymore after that.

The White Rabbit brought forth a pillow, with the scroll on top of it. He bowed his head as he approached, "Here is the Oraculum, my lady."

She nodded, picking it up. Every creature held their breath, anticipation winning out. She took the scroll, bent down to the ground, and rolled it out.

There was Dib, entering Wonderland...

Zim getting captured by the soldiers of the Red Queen...

Dib escaping on the bandersnatch...

Everyone gasped as she reached the last drawing. There was a knight in silver armor, Vorpal sword in hand, fighting gallantly against the Jabberwocky. The creature spewed fire out of it's head, aiming for the knight. A shield was in between him and the monster.

The head on the knight's body had glasses and a 'hair sword', as the knave had called it.

All eyes gazed upon Dib, who stared at the picture in amazement. Zim couldn't figure out why everyone was so surprised. If anyone asked him, it was obvious Dib was going to be their savior. He saw that coming a ways away.

For a while Dib just stared, disbelieving, at the portrait. Then, he stared out at the crowd. Then, to everyone's surprise, including Zim's, he backed away, and bolted away from the crowd with startling speed.

**Like Zim, who found that obvious? Like most of Wonderland's people, who didn't expect that at all? **

**I totally saw it coming. But I'm the author, so I don't count.**


	13. Just Accept It Already!

**Disclaimer: IZ and Alice in Wonderland do not belong to me.**

"..." Everyone went silent.

The White Queen watched in the direction Dib had run off. She then turned back to the crowd with a frown and a sigh, "Looks like the hero ditched us. Let's start the drawing for his replacement."

"NO!" The attention of the crowd was directed to Zim, who glared furiously past them, "The Dib will come back and accept his task. I know; he'll come back. He will..." At the end, he trailed off, trying not to imagine what would happen if he was wrong. If so, then he risked his life for nothing! If that happens, the Dib would pay. Oh pay, he would.

"We hope you're right, Zim," The Hatter said sympathetically, "But we need a hero. So until Dib comes back... all we can do is wait," He rubbed the Irken's back as he spoke, while said Irken stared silently at the ground, wondering whether or not the Earth child could truly handle this task.

* * *

He didn't know where he was running off to. He didn't really care. All Dib knew was that he had to get away from this- this madness! They expected a kid, a little over ten years old, to be their hero and savior? Things were easier when he and Zim were fighting for the fate of Earth.

At last, he came to rest at a small balcony overlooking Wonderland. He gasped and looked over it. Sure, he knew it was forested -his earlier exploits trying to find Zim were proof of that- but he hadn't known it was so vast, so grand, so...

"Beautiful, isn't it?"

Dib screamed and jumped for the second time that day. Looking around, he found the source of the gruff voice just above him; a caterpillar sat on a ledge above his head, seemingly smoking a pipe. For the tenth time since he got here, Dib felt as though his brained died.

The caterpillar seemed unamused at his staring, "What is it, boy, do I have something on my face? Either that or you don't know a talking caterpillar when you see one," He then blew smoke in the youth's face, causing Dib to cough violently.

"Well forgive me if seeing a talking caterpillar kinda spooked me. There aren't any other talking bugs here," He noted.

The caterpillar rolled his eyes, "Oh, I have no competition. Pity," He turned his cold gaze to Dib, who suddenly felt so much smaller, "But am I really the strangest thing you've seen here?"

Dib shook his head. The caterpillar sighed, "Thought so. You, my dear boy, are what we in the professional business call 'In denial'. You're scared out of your big head."

The comment brought back one of Dib's instincts, "MY HEAD'S NOT BIG!" He then sighed, "But you're right, I am scared. Don't I have a right to be?"

"I suppose," The caterpillar looked out over Wonderland, "I can't say I was too happy to learn that the oracle of Underland had chosen me to be it's prophet, but at least I didn't run away like a sissy baby!"

"Sissy baby?" Dib looked outraged for a moment, then realized something, "Wait, YOU'RE the prophet that wrote the Oraculum? Then you can change it, right? Make it so I'm not the hero who saves everyone?"

The disapproving stare of the caterpillar dug into him, "I'm shocked you would even ask such a thing. Destiny cannot be changed. You can, and will, save Underland."

"HOW?"

"It'll come to you. It won't be easy," He confessed, "But you do have an ally who will stick by you through this whole crazy ordeal," He blew some more smoke, this time away from Dib's general breathing area.

"Who? Zim?" Dib actually laughed aloud at the thought, but the cold stare of the Caterpillar made him rethink that, "Wait, seriously?"

"You have a destiny to accept, young human. Go back," The Caterpillar blew more smoke than before, this time right in Dib's face. Smoke clouded his sight, and he coughed into his sleeve. When it finally cleared, the Caterpillar had left.

Dib stared blankly at the spot where he had once been, "He's right. What kind of Paranormal Investigator wouldn't protect what he believes in alongside trying to prove it?" He smiled proudly, before frowning as revelation set in. He had run away. The people he was supposed to protect were probably not too happy, "I'd better get back!"

And so, once again Dib was running. This time, though, he was running towards his destiny instead of away from it.

* * *

Zim frowned at the next contestant for 'Underland's New Champion'. The White Rabbit whimpered as he was poked and prodded by spears. He then proceeded to run screaming off the stage. The White Queen shook her head.

"Zim!" The Irken turned around in time to see Dib run up to him, stopping just before crashing into him, "Am I too late?"

"No way!" He flashed a zipper grin, then dragged the Dib up onto the stage with him, holding his hand up in the air, "Sorry about that earlier stunt, folks, but HERE is Underland's savior!"

To Dib's surprise, a lot of the creatures began cheering again. Probably because a) Dib had come back, b) all the others who tried to be the champion were hopeless or c) a combination of a and b. He grinned as widely as he could at the crowd, enjoying their cheers.

The White Queen walked up, a smile on her face, "Well, now that you've gotten used to the idea of having a destiny that ties in with us, we'll have to start your training soon. After all," She poked his hair sword, "You can't be the Jabberwocky with just you're good looks."

"Dib has good looks?" Zim asked, which earned him a slap on the head from the paranormal investigator. Dib looked over the crowd, all with hopeful eyes, and turned to the White Queen with confidence.

"I'm in."

**And so, Dib's rigorous training begins! Though it'll only last a chapter. Maybe one or two more chapters before the final battle. YAYZ!... Or BOO! if you actually like this. Your call.**


	14. Also Known As Torture

**Disclaimer: IZ and Alice in Wonderland do not belong to me.**

Training Day started out at five o'clock AM. Dib was snoozing along in the little bed they had given him during his stay here. Well, little to an adult. It fit the ten year old kid just perfectly. So soundly he slept, he didn't hear the sound of the door slowly creaking open; nor did he hear soft footsteps treading across his stone floor. He did hear the trumpet blasting not a meter away from his head, though.

"AH!" Shocked, Dib fell from the bed. A familiar, maniacal laughter filled the air. He huffed, "Zim, that was SO not cool!"

"Hehehehehe..." Zim was still recovering from his fit of laughter. When he finally righted himself, he still had the laughter in his eyes, "Oh, sorry Dib, but that was priceless!"

"Yeah, yeah," Dib mumbled, embarrassed, "What did you want? Your morning chuckle? You got it, so go away."

Zim shook his head, "Nah, the queen told me to wake you up. Something about training," This made Dib's eyes bolt open. Shoot! He was late! Panicking, he ran through the room at sickening speeds, grabbing his clothes. He then turned to Zim.

"Do you mind?"

"No, not at all," Zim smiled stupidly, but his eyes still held that flicker of amusement. Dib rolled his eyes and pushed Zim out of his room so he could get dressed. Zim snickered behind the door. Boy, was Dib in for a surprise...

* * *

Several minutes of swearing at Zim, yelling at stone walls, and asking random people for directions, Dib finally made it to the courtyard where her grace, the White Queen, was waiting for him. She stood there, in all her white queen glory, with a smile planted on her face. Zim took the moment to walk out the way they came in, muttering something under his breath that Dib couldn't catch. Probably because it was in Irken.

"Dib! Oh Hero of Underland, are you prepared for a day of training, so you can face your destiny without the fear of dying?" Despite the seriousness of her words, the Queen held a semi-amused smile. Almost as if his imminent death was funny...

Never mind that, though. Dib nodded, "I guess..."

"That's the spirit!" She grinned with excitement. Nearby, a large stone door groaned as it was forced open. The Queen turned to it, the door itself hiding whoever opened it, "Oh! That must be your trainer now. I'll leave you boys be," The White Queen walked out the nearby door, not even looking back. Dib, sure this was someone important to Underland -who else would the Queen have train him?- bowed.

"It's an honor," He stated, head still down, "to meet you, sir," He heard the sound of footsteps, and then an all too familiar chuckle. Dib's eyes widened, along with a gasp.

In front of him, Zim had a satisfied look on his face, "I've always dreamed of this moment. Not quite the circumstance I would have hoped for, but it'll do."

"ZIM?" Dib looked up at the alien, "What are you doing here?"

"Her majesty asked me to train you personally," Zim responded with a dutiful tone, "And from what I've seen, you need it. Badly," Dib didn't have the time to protest. Zim had grabbed him by the arm and thrown him to the grown with strength that should've been impossible, "Now, give me ten push-ups, soldier!"

The cruel, emotionless voice of a military drill sergeant Zim had was what got Dib moving. He jumped, then began pushing himself off the ground desperately, barely being able to push himself up. His trainer scowled in displeasure at the sight.

"You call that a push-up? On Irk, we call that weak! You wouldn't last a day at the academy!" The Irken snapped at the human relentlessly. Maybe he was taking this a little too seriously...

Dib mumbled under his breath, "If they're all like you, I won't!" Once again, Dib had failed to take into account the super sensitivity of Irken lekku. The words were picked up almost immediately, and Dib found himself pressed to the ground with a boot on the small of his back. Zim, frustrated, ground the sole of his boot into Dib's back some more, hoping to get through.

He leaned over and whispered, "They weren't like me... they were MUCH worse."

The human wasn't sure whether to feel pity for Zim or dread for himself...

* * *

If anyone whom had ever trained with the Irkens -including some Irkens- were asked, they would tell you that 'training' is a synonym of 'torture'. Dib had become one of these people in less than five hours. As it turns out, where Zim failed in charisma and diplomacy, he more than made up for with threats and 'negative reinforcement'. Dib dared not say no to the Irken assigned the task of training him. Since they started, he had been forced to run the perimeter of the castle, do multiple push-ups and sit-ups, train with weights, and run in front of a group of angry cows, though Dib was suspicious that the last one was just Zim making his own entertainment.

Finally, though, they arrived at a ring set up with mats. Training swords -made of plastic- were lying against the wall. Two fencing suits laid on the bleachers. Dib 'oohed', having been waiting for this since their escape from the Red Queen's palace.

One of the two protective coverings was thrown at him, "Suit up, Dib. We have to fit this in before the end of the session," Zim slipped into his with relative ease, and then sighed and helped Dib when the human boy ended up putting it on wrong. Twice. Once that was done and over with, he picked up one of the plastic swords and twirled it expertly in his grip.

Gaping at first, Dib found his voice after a moment of seeing Zim twirl his sword so expertly, "H-how are you-?"

"The Irken's PAK has a multitude of combat preprogrammed. Swordsmanship is amongst one of the basics refined at the Irken academy," Zim sighed, nostalgic, "Good times, good times... where were we?"

"Fencing," Dib slapped his forehead with his left hand. In his right was a plastic sword, gripped tightly within his palm. That was the first thing Zim corrected.

He moved forward and adjusted Dib's hand, arm, and posture as he spoke and acted, "Don't grip your sword so tightly. Being too tense is never a good idea. Restricts your reflexes. Now, you have to think of the sword as an extension of yourself."

"Like, what, a second head?" Dib asked, staring at the plastic weapon.

Zim shook his head, "Nah, more like an extra long, really sharp arm," He showed Dib a few moves, such as the slash, thrust, parry, and block. When he felt Dib had gotten them all well enough to continue, he picked up another sword.

The alien waved the sword around expertly, "Alright, Diblet, now show me what you've learned!"

With a gulp, Dib charged at Zim, thrusting the sword towards him. When Zim blocked, he spun and brought his sword down on the alien, only to have it parried. Before he could recover, Zim landed a thrust at his hand, prying it open and causing him to drop the sword. Immediately afterwords, Zim kicked him and he landed on his back. Hard. At least the mat's were soft.

"Not bad," Zim acknowledged, "You'll need a lot more refining, though," He looked at a little watch on his wrist, which made Dib wonder: where had he gotten a watch? "Oh, look, training's over. Let's get some dinner," He walked passed Dib, stopping next to the fallen hero, and whispered into his ear, "But do not worry; we get to do this ALL again tomorrow."

Dib groaned and plopped on the floor as Zim left, snickering.

**I dunno why, but I had a lot of fun with this chapter. Now I'm gonna go watch the newest episode of the Penguins of Madagascar. Adios.**


	15. Calm Before the Storm

**Disclaimer: IZ and Alice in Wonderland do not belong to me.**

**Mostly fluff this chapter. Just a warning.**

Dib's eyes scanned the object. Bright, silvery metal glistened in the white light. Every person in the room watched in anxiety. The quiet air was only penetrated by the soft, suspenseful breath of the White Queen and all the allies Dib had made. The cobbled chamber, long and wide, held it's own magical radiance, the unique light shining through the stained glass windows. Each person, be it human, Irken, or animal, felt the tension building. All had eyes trained on Dib, who reached out and stroked the cold, smooth metal of the armor.

Finally, he broke the silence, "Why is the armor white? I mean, nothing's wrong with white but it seems kinda... predictable. Plus, it's not my color."

"Because," The White Queen began firmly yet childishly, "It's a sacred, pure color and it represents the good we're trying to protect and I'm the queen so it's my decision so ha!" Dib rolled his eyes, sending a glance to Zim. The Irken seemed torn; knowing him, though, it was probably between snickering or bursting into laughter.

Weeks had passed since Zim and Dib had begun training for the final battle. Slowly, but surely, Dib improved on his swordsmanship. The word the queen gave it was 'remarkable'. The knights' word was 'impressive'. The hatter choose to define it as 'muthnesh', though in all fairness his face had been stuffed with cake when Dib asked him. Even Zim complimented him with 'acceptable', which he believed was the highest compliment an Irken could give anyone besides themselves.

* * *

"Here we are," Dib muttered to himself, a bad habit he never tried to kick, "The final battle. The one that ends everything. The last decision between the White and Red Queens. A battle between good and evil. Enemies uniting to crush the darkness-"

A cold voice interrupted, "Are you quite done yet, kid?"

Dib jumped; the voice had been unexpected. Nonetheless, it was familiar. Upon the rafters of the room was the caterpillar whom had called himself the oracle of Underland. The one whom had named Dib this world's champion. The one who wrote the oraculum. The one who-

"Child, please, for the sake of all that is good and merciful, stop with the internal repetition!" Dib frowned and stared at the oracle. Well, he had one power down for sure; he certainly could read minds, "No, my friend, you're simply that predictable."

"If your hear to bash me, could you please go find Zim and do it where I cannot hear you?" Dib mock-begged. His eyes trailed downward to the ground. Throughout his stay here, the balcony where he had first met the oracle had been a peaceful place, one of the rare ones where he could get away from everything for a moment. He had to be careful not to spend too much time here, though. Otherwise, the others would find his one place of solitude.

The caterpillar seemed almost amused at Dib's predicament. Almost as if the bid for power in Underland was nothing more than a game. Actually, Dib mused, that was the perfect comparison. The entire civil war is a giant game of chest. The queens were the kings, soldiers were the pawns, and Dib had been named Queen for the white side. The other side had the Jabberwocky as it's queen. Zim was probably a knight; one of the more useful pieces, but still not quite as important as the Queen and King.

"Yes, there is a fine connection between the games. If you look closely enough, you'll see that all of life is a game, and all of us, mere pieces."

"And let me guess," Dib pretended to think, "You're the instruction manual."

"No," The thought seemed laughable to the caterpillar, "Though my role is similar. Now, it is over. You know the game. All that's left is to play. Just remember two things: 1) This is a team game. You're teammates are there to cover your back. You must trust them," Dib nodded, "Good. And 2) Despite everything, even if you get an opportunity to take the Red Queen, leave her to the rest of us. Destroy the Jabberwocky. That is your destiny."

"I kinda wish the rest of the times Zim gets in trouble were like this," Dib mused, "then I wouldn't be just the big-headed boy who nobody likes," When there was no response, Dib looked up, "Oracle?" The ceiling was bare of the caterpillar, and any other bug for that matter. Dib looked around. No bugs to the left. No bugs to the right. An Irken behind him. No bugs on the-

Wait, Irken?

"Zim?" Dib gaped, "How did you find me back here?"

"It wasn't easy, meat creature," Zim snapped back, "You should be grateful I went through the trouble of tracking you down. So this is where you disappear off to," Zim joined Dib on the balcony, "Sure is... there's a word for this... it's, um-"

"Peaceful?" Dib offered.

"I was thinking more along the means of quiet, but yes, it is peaceful here," Zim leaned on the rail, looking outward, "Everything's going to change after tomorrow for this world. But what about us?" He looked up, "I don't know about you, but I don't wanna go back up. It's too nice here. Feels like being lifted from under some sort of spell."

"Yeah, it's called 'Pressure'. You and I are pressured from two different sides," Dib thought about this, the difference between their sides, "So after this, we're enemies again, huh?"

"This is a temporary truce," Zim confirmed, "At first, I protected you because I assumed you were going to leave immediately. At the castle, I sacrificed myself to save you; something no other Irken would have done," A little quieter, he whispered, "Maybe this is what they mean by defect..."

"What?"

"Nothing. Anywho, tomorrow is the Frabjous Day. The day you go into battle and defeat the Jabberwocky once and for all. I know you're prepared; I've trained you myself. But... are you ready?"

"Thing is," Dib responded, "I don't really have a choice. I'm going to sleep. See you tomorrow."

"Dib..."

"Yeah?"

"...never mind," Zim waved him off, "Get a good nights rest," Zim didn't leave as Dib walked away. For a moment, he wondered what Zim was going to say. Then he shook it off. If it was important, Zim would mention it without hesitation. He wasn't the type to hold back anything except defeat, the one thing he never could accept. A thought past through his mind but he shook it off.

After all, Zim would never surrender. It's not in his nature.

**Yeah... sorry about this pathetic excuse for a chapter. More of a filler to leave some time for me to come up with the final battle.**


	16. The Epic Battle of Epicness! Part One

**Disclaimer: IZ and Alice in Wonderland do not belong to me.**

The battle itself seemed to have been planned in advance. The Red Queen and White Queen met at no man's land, both holding a determination to end this. Even if they did hope for two different endings. Ironically, the place they met for the final battle was a chess board. Yesterday's musings came back to mind as Dib followed the White Queen down the trail. To his immediate left was Zim, proudly displaying the new armor given to him by the Knights of the White Queen.

On the other side walked in the Red Queen with her seemingly endless army of red cards. On her side was the Knave, who smirked, eagerly awaiting the coming battle. No where in sight was the Jabberwocky. Both sides lined the end of the chess board-like battlefield. The two leaders got off their horses and met at the center.

For a while, all was silent. Then the White Queen spoke, "We do not have to fight, sister. Let us make peace, not war."

"You can make all the peace you want," The Red Queen snarled in return, "I will, in the meanwhile, take good care of Underland."

Zim scoffed at her proclamation, "Like that big-headed, cold-hearted demon queen could do anything but please herself," Dib shushed him, not wanting to miss this. It may be important.

The white rabbit, the only neutral character between the two kingdoms, walked in between the two queens and blew his horn-trumpet-thing, afterwords announcing, "On this, the Frabjous Day, the queens Red and White shall send forth their chosen champions to do combat on their behalf."

"Please," The White Queen begged again, "We don't have to do this. Just stop..." She pouted and blinked her eyes like a young child trying to charm an adult.

The Red Queen smiled without any joy and proclaimed, "Oh no, I know what this is about. You think you can blink those pretty little eyes of yours and I'll melt... just like mommy and daddy!" Behind her smile, the rage could be seen building.

"Sister, please..." She tried begging once more, hoping falsely to avoid combat.

"NO!" The sudden outburst was loud enough to knock Zim backwards. Dib looked down at him, half wondering whether he should get down off the bandersnatch to help him. The yelling of the Red Queen, however, drew his attention away, "It is MY crown! I AM THE OLDEST!" She turned around and shouted to the skies, "JABBERWOCKY!" The sisters stared at each other, then backed away towards their respective sides. Behind the Red Queen, her card soldiers backed away to the sides. The White Rabbit, terrified, dropped his trumpet-thing and ran.

All the beings of Underland shook in terror. The Cheshire Cat vanished in this air. The mountains in the direction of the Red Queen's castle started shaking. Finally, it was revealed that these mountains were no mountains; but in fact were the Jabberwocky itself. The huge thing was a bone-thin dragon, with black scales and a ferocious roar. Slowly, it crept down.

"This is impossible..." Dib whispered to Zim, "and I have to fight this thing?"

"Yup."

"Think I can win?"

"Yup."

"...are you just saying that so I won't get worried?"

"Yup."

"Fail," Dib smiled kindly, "but thanks for trying, dude."

"Just remember your training," Zim instructed, "You'll be surprised at how much the basics alone will help you. That thing doesn't look like it can fly right; try to get to a higher area, where it's restricted. Don't be afraid to retreat to collect yourself if needed. If there is anyway I can help at all," Zim took his eyes off the Jabberwocky he was previously studying, looking into Dib's eyes, "just signal me."

The red-eyed beast's appearance caused the Red Queen to smirk, "And your champion, sister?"

"Right here," Dib interrupted before the White Queen could speak. Instead of talking, she just looked her sister in the eye and smiled politely.

The Red Queen spoke without emotion, "Hello, Dib-Thing."

"Great, now she's calling me names, too!"

The Jabberwocky walked onto the battlefield, hissing like a snake, "We meet again, my old enemy."

"I've never seen you before in my life," Dib answered honestly.

"Not you, human child. The Vorpal One," Dib realized he was talking about the sword. He also realized how close the Jabberwocky was. Without hesitation, he slew his sword at the large dragon, cutting off it's tongue. The White Queen raised her hand to her mouth, looking like she was going to vomit. The Jabberwocky cried out, then swept his tail across the ground, tripping Dib up. He landed in the dirt. Zim frowned.

The creature cried out again and tried to stomp on Dib, who barely rolled out of the way. Now on his feet again, he was able to effectively thrust his sword at the Jabberwocky, all attempted blows missing. When he blew lightning out of his mouth, he defended with the silver shield equipped on his hand. Dib took a breath and ran forward, underneath the belly of the beast. On the other side, he turned swiftly and socked Dib, sending him soaring and landing with a cry of pain. Zim's frown deepened.

The sword landed behind Dib, who scrambled to get it. Had the Jabberwocky gotten the chance to interfere, it would have. It never did get that chance, as something sharp pricked it's tail, forcing it to turn around. Their stood Zim, all four PAK legs destended outward. One of them had black blood on it.

"The green-thing's interfering!" The Red Queen cried, in an almost sing-song like manner, "Off with his head!" The soldiers on both sides ran forth.

And so it begins...

**Epically epic, huh? Next time on: Follow Me Down**

"**Off with your head!" Le gasp!**


	17. The Epic Battle of Epicness! Part Two

**Disclaimer: IZ and Alice in Wonderland do not belong to me.**

Both armies charged forward. With the White Queen leading one side, and the Red Queen leading the other, things got exciting real quickly. Swords clashed. Archers launched high into the air. An especially fierce fight broke out between Zim and the Knave. The two fought valiantly, with Zim using his PAK legs and the Knave using a fine metal sword. Clearly evenly matched, they continued to face off.

Not too far away from the central battle, another, more important one was taking place. Around the time every other warrior had started running forward, Dib and the Jabberwocky were fighting their own private fight away from everyone else. Zim's voice, with all the warnings, came into his head, telling him which way to lunge, which way to dodge to best avoid being hurt. One thing was certain: remembering the basics helped a lot, as Zim had said they would. It only took a simple parry to save his life.

Back on the battlefield, the Hatter and March Hare were the one's leading the actual army. The White Queen focused her powers on keeping all ranged attacks away from her men, mostly by intercepting them with arrows. Despite her pacifist ways, she was quite the archer. Just ahead of her, Zim hopped over the head of the Knave, barely avoiding having his stomach (or whatever the Irken equivalent is) being cut open. He straightened himself almost immediately, ready to intercept the next attack. The Knave lunged forward; a firm scowl revealed the anger and aggression thrown into each attack. He let out a battle cry.

A tower, mostly destroyed, was being further mutilated as Dib ran upward, avoiding the swiping talons of his opponent. Intercepting the attacks with his sword was actually quite easy; no, the problem was the platform. While trying to get to higher ground, Dib had placed himself in the undesirable situation of having unstable ground below his feet. Not good against an opponent with such powerful attacks. Yet, even though he could easily take out the ground, the Jabberwocky didn't. Either it didn't occur to him, or he wanted to draw out the battle for as long as possible. Dib had no idea which one was better.

Zim easily dodged the thrust, merely bending his metallic arms to avoid the blow. Once it past by, the upper-left arm swooped to the Knave with the intent of taking him out. Suddenly black leather wrapped around the arm, holding it a little too tightly, almost as if trying to crush it. With a little bit more strength than he originally thought necessary, Zim pulled his weapon from the Knave's grip. A hack towards the high end got easily dodged; while the low end was jumped over. Each evenly matched, it seemed as though the duo's fight would go on forever.

Dib continued up the rounded stair, hoping to get an edge over the Jabberwocky at the top. Occasionally he would have to turn around and defend his position, but it was mostly just maneuvering that kept him alive. From the tower, he could see everything going on below him. Despite the danger looming dreadfully over him, he couldn't help but awe at it for a moment. THEN he turned around and slashed at the Jabberwocky's incoming claw.

With each slash, the Knave forced Zim to back up a little more, until he was against a wall. He then made the mistake of attempting a finishing blow. Dodging it was a breeze for Zim, just ducking, then lunging forward with a heavy amount of force. Knocking the Knave on his back was an added bonus as well, Zim smirked as he poised his mechanical arm for the killing blow.

_On top of the tower at last!_ Dib thought; stopping for a split-second to breathe. In that one split-second, the Jabberwocky caught up with him, poising just above him for the kill. Despite the dire situation, Dib smirked. This felt a lot like the picture Dib saw on the Oracle-thingy. It lunged forward, and that's when Dib acted. He jumped onto it's back, ignoring it's fierce screeches, and shouted, uncaring as to who heard, "Off with your head!" The Vorpal Sword cut down, a clean slice that took the beast's head off. Dib watched as it began bouncing down the stair, kinda like a beach ball.

Zim narrowed his eyes, fully prepared to take this cruel man's life. On the ground, in front of Zim, he cowered like an animal. Pathetic. Just then, a strange sound caught his attention, and his antennae twitched ever so slightly at it. With a turn of the head, he saw it. The dead body of the Jabberwocky falling to the ground, and it's head bouncing down the stairwell of the tower. Zim smiled. Then he turned back to the Knave, and brought his arm down. The Knave screamed rather girlishly.

Then he looked up. Only a slight cut on his face that probably wouldn't even scar. Zim stared at him in mocking and disgust, "Worm! I have spared your pathetic life. Be grateful."

The Red Queen gasped. The White Queen looked like she was going to vomit. Everyone else began cheering for the hero of Underland. The Red Queen shouted for her men to take Dib's head. They all threw down their weapons. One even picked her up (along with the Knave) and brought her to her sister. She, in a very out-of-character way, coldly regarded her sibling.

"What are you going to do?" The Red Queen mocked, "Kill me? You don't have the nerve."

The White Queen frowned, "No, I will not kill you," Before the Red Queen could say anything in response, she continued, "I am going to banish you to the Far Beyond, at the edge of Underland. There you two will live out your lives, scavenging for food and barely scrapping by. Let's hope your both strong," With those final words, the White Queen walked out of her sister's life.

"Well," The Red Queen tried to find a bright side, "At least we still have each other," She smiled, again in an out-of-character way, at the Knave. His eyes widened in some unseen horror, before he pulled a knife out of his pocket and attempted to stab the Queen in the head. A PAK leg from Zim knocked the knife out of his hands. He glanced at Zim, who smirked coldly, before walking away with the Queen and Dib, "He tried to kill me," The Red Queen declared in disbelief, "He tried to kill me..." Obviously still in shock, she barely acknowledged the soldiers dragging her away.

The White Queen, and Zim, walked to Dib, who was wiping the blood off the Vorpal Sword with a randomly claimed rag. He looked up at them and smiled, but frowned curiously when the Queen walked over to the Jabberwocky's body and pricked it, gathering a little blood in a vial, "What's this?" He asked.

"This... is your ticket home," The White Queen stated, "You drink it," She bluntly ignored Dib's sickened expression, "and make the wish to be home. That is the power of Jabberwocky blood."

"Or, you know, you could stay here," The Hatter offered, smiling. Dib smiled back, a sad, almost mournful smile.

"I think all of you are amazing... but I should be getting back home. Gaz will have my throat if I stay here too much longer," He looked to Zim, "Are you staying here?"

Zim waved him off, "Nah, I'm getting tired of this place. I'll go to the Surface World with you."

"It's decided then," She handed the bottle to Dib, "Drink," He stared at it, disgusted, before reluctantly consuming the deep crimson liquid. He made a face, "Don't do that. You look like you're sucking on a lemon."

"Sorry," The human meekly apologized. A hand, smoother and notably smaller than his, slipped into his grip and held tight. Zim smiled sheepishly. A moment later, both human and Irken started glowing a bright light. When it faded, the two were gone.

"I'm gonna miss those little scamps," The Hatter sniffled, "Especially that big headed one..."

"MY HEAD'S NOT BIG!"

**Fade to white.**

**One more chapter, I've decided. And about the whole hand-holding thing, Zim couldn't go back with Dib unless they were physically connected somehow. That was the easiest way. Um... bye.**


	18. The End Finally!

**Remialcsid: em ot gnoleb ton od Dnalrednow ni Ecila dna ZI. (What? I was bored)**

Gaz glanced up from her Game Slave 2. Her brother, Dib, was late. By exactly five minutes and forty-three seconds. When she saw him next, she was going to doom him so hard, he would be picking teeth of the floor for a month. Groaning, she reluctantly left her seat to find her dull-witted brother. More likely than not, he was playing with that stupid green friend of his... Zor, or something.

Surely enough, after a while of looking around she saw footprints -two different sets- leading into the forest not far from the school. Gaz hated the woods. They got her shoes all dirty and she'd have to actually look where she's going. Sighing angrily, she walked along their trail, following the footprints until she came to a tree. There, in a rabbit hole, the footprints stopped. Gaz wondered, for a moment, if her dad would care that she left Dib in a hole. A surprisingly deep one, by the looks of it. Gaz turned away, wondering what to do at that moment.

Unfortunate for her, though. If she hadn't turned around, she would have seen the bright white light from deep within the rabbit hole. She would have heard the familiar screams of her older brother and his alien nemesis. She might have laughed her butt off watching them somehow fall out of the hole, hit the branches of the tree, and fall back to the ground, suddenly going silent. She did hear the last bit, though, and turned around to find the two in a jumbled mess on the ground.

Her face twitched. She picked Dib up by his collar and looked him in the eye. I don't know if you've ever been looked in the eye by a demon, but trust me: It's scary. Dib cringed at her glare, "Dib. I had wasted five minutes and forty-three seconds of my life waiting for you at the school. I also wasted four minutes and twenty-four seconds of that life tracking you down. Next time you wanna play with your dweeb alien friend," She gestured to Zim, "let me know so I can actually not waste my time. Understood?"

Too scared to talk properly, Dib nodded. Satisfied, Gaz dropped him and walked away. Once she was out of this forest, her games would become all too easy for her. But in this atmosphere... she couldn't handle it. She needed out. Now.

Zim stood and brushed himself off, watching Gaz walk away. He shuttered, "Either you're cursed, or someone enjoys torturing you," Dib walked back over to him, "Whichever is true, I feel kind of sorry for you."

"Not as sorry as anyone who tries to do anything to her might be," Dib responded, wincing as he poked a bruise on his neck. When Gaz got mad, she REALLY got mad!

"Or Gir," Zim added, "Speaking of whom, where is he? Before we went to Underland, I sent him a message to bring the Voot around. He should be by now," He checked some watch-type thing from his PAK, "I stand corrected. He'll be here in three... two... now!" At that exact moment, something collided with Dib, forcing him to crash into a nearby tree. In his place was the 'Voot' and Gir.

The window opened and, sure enough, the crazed dog-robot thing popped it's head out. Gir sang out, "Hi!" Before jumping and landing on the ground. Once he spotted Dib, though, his eyes turned red and his tune changed to, "Enemy alert!" Missiles, bombs and other random weapons popped out of Gir's metal head, all pointed towards and targeting Dib. The human gulped.

Luckily, while Zim found the situation hilarious, he decided to stop it, "Gir! The Dibbling is not our enemy... for today," The command satisfied Gir, and he went back to normal blue cutesy Gir, whom waved at Dib cheerfully.

All Dib could think to say was, "I am SO glad he was late. Wonderland was crazy enough without Gir there," and Zim nodded in agreement.

Completely worn out, both heroes began the trudge home, side by side. In a way only two unlikely friends could accomplish.

**Wow, this is bad. You've been waiting how long, and you get THIS? I blame creative slumps. Hey, at least it's over, right?**


End file.
